“THE EXORCISM OF EMILY ROSE” (2005)

Starring: Jennifer Carpenter, Laura Linney & Tom Wilkinson
Written by Paul Harris Boardman & Scott Derrickson
Directed by Scott Derrickson

Polly Staffle Rating: ***

Exorcisms are something I never gave thought to as being real. Call me naive, but I just never thought people actually believed in demonic possession any more than they believed in zombies, werewolves and vampires. “The Exorcism of Emily Rose” is not your typical scary movie. It's not even a full-fledged horror movie. It contains scenes from a genre movie, cut and pasted into a court room drama. The film is inspired by a true story so there's no Linda Blair, no spinning head, no green slime puking, no bed flying and no crucifix masturbation to spook you like in “The Exorcist.” The fact that people that believe in possession and exorcism exists is what makes this film scary.

“Emily Rose” is a good film in the way that it doesn't tell you what to think, but gives you something to ponder. It is based on Anneliese Michel's story. She was a German college student in the late 1970's that died as a result of neglect at the hands of her parents and priests because they felt she needed an exorcism instead of medical attention. This isn't a completely accurate film, but it is good for opening communication lines about these types of beliefs and what the actual problem is when someone is “possessed.” If you believe in demonic possession then you will see this film as reinforcement of that belief. If you are a heathen like me (who is obviously possessed since I don't believe in the mumbo-jumbo) then you can see this as reinforcement in that direction. After seeing this movie, all I could think about is how the practice of performing an exorcism should be illegal.

Think of all the silly laws on the books. Think of all the moral laws we must obey. Prostitution is the best example I can think of. It is legal to have sex with any other consenting adult. It doesn't matter if you just met. It doesn't matter if you don't know each other's name. It doesn't matter what disease you have or what disease they have. It doesn't matter their age (assuming they are of legal age in your state), race, religion or sex. But once you bring money into the equation, the activity is illegal (except in various counties and countries). It is legal to buy alcohol and consume it, which can lead to the destruction of families, as well as death. It is legal to buy a hammer, which can be used as a weapon and cause death and the destruction of families. It is legal to buy and consume fast food, which can lead to diabetes, which can lead to death and the destruction of families. But don't think of buying a hooker. Prostitution is the act of two consenting adults trading money for a service. No one is twisting anyone's arm to do the buying and no one is being forced to sell. Yes, there will always be people who will force others to sell sex, just like it is possible someone will put a gun to your head and say, “Go to the store, buy a hammer, come back home and kill your family.” That's why I say outlaw the pimps and treat them just like you would the guy putting a gun to someone's head and forcing them to do something against their will. Okay, okay, I know I am getting way off track here.

My point is, why aren't exorcisms illegal? Do a quick search online and you will find a number of stories about deaths caused by this practice. Wikipedia.org lists six deaths since 1995. Among them, a young girl was suffocated with a plastic bag by her mother in 1998, an eight-year-old autistic boy died from asphyxiation due to his pastor laying on top of him in 2004, and a 23-year-old nun was crucified in June of last year. Does this make a bit of sense to anyone else? Sure, if a person dies during an exorcism, murder charges are brought up against someone, but why not do away with the whole concept? We aren't allowed to burn people at the stake anymore. Witch hunts are allowed, but are carried out only by police, media, lawyers, jurors and judges, and not by villagers carrying torches. If you have demons that need some exercise, I mean exorcizing, you can find links to various exorcists online. I'm not naming any websites out of fear that I will be seen as mocking someone. There seems to be a growing phenomenon I never knew existed though. Even the Pope has carried out exorcisms.

It doesn't look too hard to jump start your career in the ministry of deliverance. There is actually an association with a certification program. Courses offered include “Introduction to Demonic Possession and Exorcism,” “Witchcraft/Wicca,” “Satanism,” “The Ouija Board,” “Halloween: Whose Trick is it Anyway?,” and “U.F.O.'s: The Occult Connection.” I kid you not. Their website warns however, “…if one is considering this form of ministry because he/she thinks 'it would be neat to be able to contact and talk with demons,' he/she should definitely NOT choose this form of ministry. The last thing that demons want to do is have a fireside chat or make friends with people.”

So the activity of exorcism is completely legal as long as no one dies. Why isn't prostitution legal, and when the act of sex results in a death, charge the hooker or john with murder? Do you see the madness I am talking about?

In “Emily Rose,” the defense argues intent. The priest had good intentions in what he was doing. His intentions were not to harm the girl. If it was a case of someone hitting a pedestrian with their car, intent means the difference between murder and manslaughter. If exorcisms are against the law, there is no need to argue intent. If your intention in selling someone crack was to pay your house note and support your family, are you that bad of a guy? Do you even deserve a slap on the wrist if your intention is to help a poor woman pay for her college tuition when you proposition her for sex? If you are a gang member protecting your territory like an army protects their country, do you deserve jail time for a drive-by-shooting? Of course my questioning is ridiculous. That's my point. We don't usually question intent when someone breaks the law.

But back to the movie. I watched the uncut “Emily Rose” and not the original PG-13 version. What that means is there is more contorting and convulsing then the theatrical release. I'm guessing about the rating because I'm not sure what was so bad it had to be snipped. Let me put it this way: the director's cut of the TV-made movie “Helter Skelter” was more violent and graphic. So if you are looking for blood and scares, look elsewhere.

Speaking of “Helter Skelter,” did you ever notice the only people that become possessed by demons are usually always those individuals who believe in exorcisms or have parents that are believers? Think about it. If you are an old man on the street corner yelling a million miles per second about how you used to be fat, until being abducted by aliens and cured with a laser gun - you're not possessed. You're a nuisance, but not a big enough menace for anyone to do anything to help you. If you believe you hear demons in your head that make you do or not do things, and you don't act on these orders, then you are simply insane. But, if you do act on the orders from your demons, you could be prosecuted as a criminal (depending on what the demons ordered you to do). If you think you are a messiah and want to spread your seed amongst a small, self contained community - you're not possessed either. Just crazy, and you might be considered a pervert or molester by society (think David Koresh). If you speak of a revolution and have followers that will kill for you, you're not only psycho, but also a terrorist.

But if you were raised to believe in exorcisms, and start going off the deep end, you aren't mentally ill and in need of medical help, you're possessed. If you are a hyper child and start acting crazy and have parents that are believers, you too are possessed. If you are prone to having seizures and are not medicated, the devil is in you as well. If you are from a religious background and are mentally handicapped, disturbed or simply suffer from anxiety, Satan needs to be forced out of you. And if everyone around you is insane and believes in exorcisms, you could be next, probably for something stupid like using profanity.

Exorcisms don't belong anywhere, except in movies. Like zombies, vampires and werewolves, their sole purpose should be to entertain us and not be something actually believed in and practiced. I say exorcisms should be against the law and those that perform this ritual should face prison time, regardless if anyone dies. The people that believe in exorcisms are not only insane, but obviously possessed.

- CCF, February 2006