“DARK WALKER” (2003)

Starring: Kathleen Taylor, Michael Sage, David DeWitt, Brenda Matthews, Rick Irvin, Emily van Sonnenberg, Clive Hawkins, Jill Small, Ali Taylor, Brad Potts, Ivan Glenn Hill, James Inch, Chris Giese, Jeff Meleski, Lamb Gaede, Lynx Gaede, Ronald Dean Blackwell, April Gaede, Dolores Golightly, Jennifer Vanderbliek, Daniel Roebuck & Chuck Williams
Written by Dan Jacobs (screenplay) & Chuck Williams (story)
Directed by Danny Draven
Official Site

Polly Staffle Rating: **

As a long time fan of horror films, I’ve had two movie ideas in my head that I have been waiting for someone to make. One of the ideas was a haunted casino. Charles Band evidently had the same idea as he made the film “Dead Man’s Hand” set in a Las Vegas casino with Sid Haig as a ghost. The other concept I had was based around a Halloween haunted attraction with a real boogeyman snuffing out customers and cast members.

This time it was actor/producer Chuck Williams (“Bubba Ho-Tep,” “Straight into Darkness”) with the think-alike great mind. Williams produced the film based on his original concept and plays the title character, which some may recognize as a monster mask featured in the Judd Apatow comedy “Knocked Up.”

Helmed by cult filmmaker Danny Draven, who has directed five independent features that have all made a profit and sold domestically and internationally, “Dark Walker” is a teen slasher. The film takes place at the haunted house theme park Hobb’s Grove. The Halloween attraction was evidently built on cursed or haunted land. No, not evidently; it was. We see a glimpse of its bloody past and are told the “little town was built on a lot of dead people’s bodies.” When you cut the trees down on the property, they bleed and late at night the scary ass Dark Walker rises from his grave and spills the blood of anybody and everybody that is anywhere trespassing near his property. He doesn’t just spill their blood, he splashes it all about, coating everything in the vicinity.

“Dark Walker” is a cheesy low budget straight-to-video production. If you are familiar with any of the films Draven has directed (“Deathbed”) or edited (“The Gingerdead Man”) then you know what you are in for. There’s forced humor, a lack of suspense, but most of all the script and its characters are extremely cliché. The latter is probably more true than usual. Script writer Dan Jacobs seems to have plugged in all the usual horror movie suspects as his possible victims.

There’s the goth girl (played by Emily van Sonnenberg), the token African American (Rick Irvin), the jock (Michael Sage), the stoner (Clive Hawkins), the rich bitch (Jill Small) the incompetent hillbilly sheriff (Brad Potts), creepy old people that try to warn everyone (Dolores Golightly and Ivan Glenn Hill) and the new kid (Kathleen Taylor) that seems to be hiding something and may have self-esteem issues, mental problems, super natural abilities or all of the above. Rounding out the film’s characters are the owners of the haunted attraction - the Magees (David DeWitt and Brenda Matthews), who might know a little more than they pretend they do. To fill you in on all the gossip real quick, the goth girl’s name is Carrion, which means the carcass of a dead animal, and the stoner guy’s name is Reef. The black guy at one point makes sure to note that he doesn’t like fried chicken, but instead prefers his baked. Later he proves to strictly be a white meat man as he hooks up with the goth girl. There also is a love connection brewing between the jock and the new girl.

Despite its flaws, “Dark Walker” proves to be a lot of fun. The clichés and stereotypes walk a fine line. While they do take the viewer out of the story a bit, they also give the film a bit of charm. Blatantly building his story around overused cardboard characters, Jacobs offers commentary on the horror genre. At the same time, this is a film that takes place at a Halloween haunted attraction, where surface illusions, masks, fake blood, special effects, displays, smoke and mirrors, fog, etc. are the norm. There’s no getting to know the true character’s behind the scenes when you walk into one of these places to get a scare during the month of October, so don’t be expecting it here.

What “Dark Walker” does offer, however, are a lot of trippy haunted attraction visuals and a pretty cool villain. Dark Walker, who was featured on a collectable Terror Cards trading card, is part Leatherface (“The Texas Chainsaw Massacre”), part Gill Man (“Creature from the Black Lagoon”) and part Creeper (“Jeepers Creepers”). He’s a swampy, ugly creature that is dancing around and killing people with a chainsaw one minute, smashing up doors, ripping hearts out of chests, snapping necks and slashing people up with a sickle the next. Though we can’t see that it’s Chuck Williams as the monster, you just know he is smiling big behind the mask and is loving every bit of his time as the murdering beast.

As for Dark Walker’s home, Hobb’s Grove is an actual haunted attraction in Sanger, Cal. According to its website, “over 100 ghouls lurk in the shadows of over 30 acres.” It features a haunted forest, a midway, a hayride and a haunted house, offering the “complete Halloween experience.” The amusement park was one of more than 40 recently featured in the must have spooktacular shockumentary DVD set “Halloween: The Happy Haunting of America,” which was an ode to haunted attractions from Chuck Williams and Daniel Roebuck (otherwise known as The Bat Pack or The Boys of Halloween).

In many ways “Dark Walker” can be seen as a complimentary DVD to the “Happy Haunting” set. Like that one, “Dark Walker” is a perfect watch on All Hallow’s Eve. Draven’s film doesn’t really bring anything new to the genre, but for what it is, it works. The Halloween vibe is heavy, the blood is a plenty, the camp factor is decent and the killer is a super beast.

So come one, come all kiddies and gather around your television sets, place this movie in the player and let the party start. As the Silver Shamrock commercial in “Halloween III: Season of the Witch” said, “All witches, all skeletons, all Jack-O-Lanterns, gather ’round and watch.”

Also of note, early on in the film, be on the look out for twins Lynx and Lamb Gaede, the sisters that make up the white nationalist band Prussian Blue and listen for Williams and his pal Daniel Roebuck (of the Rob Zombie films “The Devil’s Rejects,” “Halloween” and “The Haunted World of El Superbeasto”) as morning radio disc jockeys.

- CCF, June 2008