“SLITHER” (2006)

Starring: Elizabeth Banks, Nathan Fillion, Michael Rooker & Gregg Henry
Written & Directed by James Gunn

Polly Staffle Rating: **

Despite what VH1 says, there really wasn’t much good in regards to entertainment that came from the 80s. Most of the music was bad and so were the movies, especially the horror movies. Gross-out gore, cheesy humor and bad special effects were the specialty. Those are the things that pretty well sum up “Slither.” It is very much a retro 80’s film. For that reason, there’s going to be some people that just absolutely love it. I’m just not one of them.

There are many positives to the movie. It can’t really be put in one single horror sub-genre. It’s a zombie movie, it’s a creature feature, it’s a hillbilly woods film and it’s a horror-comedy. The movie also has a great soundtrack, mostly featuring alternative country with the Old 97’s song “The New Kid” playing over the closing credits. This served as a breath of fresh air for me because I’ve been getting a little tired of the genre movies trying to cash in with soundtrack CD’s filled with “trendy” metal bands. Us horror fans aren’t just fans of Slipknot, Marilyn Manson, System of a Down and Korn. We like the music to be mixed up from time to time and not just when the movies are period pieces.

“Slither” also features some real-like qualities at times. The people in this film seem like real people. They look like actual teenagers with acne and they act like real wives and don’t strip naked to expose fake breasts. For example, Starla (Elizabeth Banks, who plays Betty Brant in the “Spider-Man” films) refutes sex when she isn’t in the mood and goes to bed with curlers in her hair, not all dolled up like a porn star. The realism slips later though, as her husband Grant Grant (Michael Rooker of “Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer”) puts a lock on the cellar door and she barely questions it. After hell breaks loose in the film, Starla busts the door open to find a basement John Wayne Gacy would be proud of.

“Slither” is also downright hilarious. The Mayor (Gregg Henry) was a riot, especially in a scene where he tried blaming the town’s troubles on lyme’s disease. I was constantly reminded of a certain infamous Las Vegas mayor just about every time Henry’s character opened his mouth. “Slither” also features nods to many great horror films. There aren’t necessarily specific scenes lifted from other movies, but several times I felt there were moments very reminiscent of classics like “The Blob,” “Scream” and “Halloween.” All these things added together make “Slither” a fun watch, but it’s not the kind of horror movie I can fully embrace and want to see over and over again.

I have an uncle who I bet will love this film to death. Actually, if my uncle was to ever write a screenplay, it would probably be something like this. My uncle Tim is actually who first got me hooked on scary movies. Tim will watch any and every horror film and enjoy the hell out of it. He actually laughed so loud in a theater once, management came and told him to quiet down or they would have to escort him out the door. Being around my uncle was always a lot of fun. We loved to go spend the night at his house. I have many fond memories of spending weekends with my uncle, my brother and my cousins Bo and James. It always meant getting our own frozen pizza for dinner, eating gallons of ice cream and working in his yard. In exchange for yard work, Tim took us to the movies. Best of all, he took us to see R-rated movies. “April Fools Day,” “House,” “Nightmare on Elm Street 2” and “Day of the Dead” were among the 80’s horror films I saw with him. Looking back now, most of the movies we went to see pretty much sucked, but I still have fond memories of them. “Slither” seemed like one of the movies we would have seen with Tim. In fact it actually seemed a hell of lot like one of them – “Critters.”

“Slither” opens with a meteor falling from the sky into a small country town. When the rock cracks open, there ends up being an alien creature inside that has the ability to enter a person’s body and control them. Now, I don’t fully remember all the finer plot details of the film “Critters” as I have never studied the screenplay and have only seen the film once twenty years ago, but unless I am mistaken, its storyline is very similar. The difference being, in “Critters” the bad guys were cute little furry animals that were a rip-off of “Gremlins” and in “Slither” we get fat ugly leaches. The “Critters” weren’t able to change forms, but there were bounty hunters tracking them down that could. The other thing that reminded me of “Critters” was in that film, the furry gobblers could attach themselves into a big ball and roll as one big boulder. Here in “Slither” the victims of the creature end up becoming attached in one big disgusting octopus-like mass. (I'm also told the film is a lot like “Night of the Creeps,” but I either didn't see it or it didn't leave a strong impression on me.)

What also reminded me of the horror films of the 80’s was the blood spilling. You see, I am a fan of old school gore, not the gross-out variety. The difference is I’m all for someone’s head splattering when they get shot or someone getting an arm, tongue or leg chopped off. Gross-out gore on the other hand is what Troma Studios and bad Stephen King films like “Dreamcatcher” are known for. I figured writer and director James Gunn was obviously a huge fan of Troma since not only is the same type of gore present, but Lloyd Kaufman has a cameo appearance and there’s a clip of “The Toxic Avenger” featured. Turns out he is more than just a fan. Gunn cut his teeth writing and directing the cult hit “Tromeo & Juliet” with Kaufman. (By the way, another guest appearance to be on the listen for in the film is Rob Zombie. He plays the voice of a doctor during a telephone call.) For those that want examples of gross-out gore, it’s when you have creatures that look like they are inside out such as the Jabba the Hutt squid freak show I mentioned earlier. Gross-out gore is also a huge worm trying to make their way inside someone’s mouth as the person tries to stop them and a pregnant woman blown up to the actual size of a blimp and then popping to unleash leaches.

I’m not saying this is grossest movie I have seen. That award would go to the 1983 barf-fest “Xtro,” which disturbed me as a child because it features a woman giving birth to a grown man. But I will say there were women leaving the movie theater less than half way through, so don’t take the wife and kids. It’s definitely not a good choice for a blind date either. However, if you’re an uncle with a bunch of nephews coming over to help you do yard work, this is definitely a recommended film. It’s low on nudity, but more than makes up for that with humor and sickly sights. Just try not to laugh too loud.

- CCF, March 2006